Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Mow Hai Hai Mow? Hairy Crabs at Dragon i.

Paranoid Android, who is the next Walking Wikipedia after Nigel Skelchy, (Nigel has the age advantage), asked on Twitter, are hairy crabs "Mow Hai" in Cantonese. Ciki replies, "Mow Hai, Hai Mow?". All my friends are comedians. My twitter page can be the script for a sitcom, as could my MSN, especially exchanges with the Venerable Thamby, aka Queen of the DSLR.

Those doomed to a life of humdrumness, and twiddling thumbs and swatting flies, like me, sit around all day waiting for friends to call. So, when I saw a Yahoo msg or was it an sms, from CIKI, obviously I scramble to open it quicker than our government changes it policies. And that's quick. OOOH, she asks me to be her date (I am shivering with excitement already) for a food tasting of Hairy Crabs (not Hairy's Crab....Hairy Crabs) from the famous Tai lake, at Dragon I at the Curve, on a lazy Saturday afternoon. Turned out the day was anything BUT lazy.

Mad rush ensued, as I juggled with the 15 cake orders for the day, and a slight hangover from the night before. Although it was just a little tipple with friends from the gym, this old man's resistance is dropping as quickly as his waistline is expanding. I was the LAST to arrive at Dragon I, much to my embarrasment, as seated on two tables were like the blogging gliterrati of Malaysia. The Queen Herself, KY Speaks, Nigel Skelchy, Ciki, KgBoy&Citygal. Gasp, its like attending an event with the DYMM himself, and coming late. I apologized profusely to our host, a very friendly Mr Kong, of PRK (PR Kraft), the PR company for the Dragon I group.

The first dish was the double boiled superior chicken soup with Fish Maw and Bamboo Pith. Superb hangover food. Cleansing to the soul, and rehydrating to the body. It wasn't too salty, as some soups are prone to be. The textures of the fish maw and chicken were just right.

They are very well prepared, the restaurant, as they even presented a bowl of soup specially for photography. A bit like a bride....doesnt always look like the real deal.

The next dish was Sauteed Fresh Vegetables With Crab Roe. Female crab roe, Kong explained to us. Female crab roe is harder and coarse than male crab roe.

"Male crabs have roe?" I ask in bewilderment. Obviously I should watch more National Geographic, and less Grey's Anatomy, as the latter doesn't teach you about crab anatomy.

Aren't the Xiu Long Baos with Hairy Crab row absolutely adorable? So dainty, almost a sin to eat them.

Of course, elegance should be consumed with elegance......
Of course no one saw it fit to photograph ME wolfing down MY xiu long bao, with all the finesse of a drunken sailor on heat.

Young Chow Style Fried Rice....probably the mandatory carb dish in the set. Oh, I did mention it was a set right? RM128++ for a six course Shanghainese set meal. Loved the rice. Fluffy, enough wok hei, and all that jazz. As Nigel pointed out, the prawns had been in a sodium bicarbonate spa for too long, and while they were texturally crunchy, there was about as much taste in it as a noveau rich chinaman decorating his newly built mansion in Kenny Hills.

We're heading for the climax, and given the necessary tools to do so as well.

No, its not for you to dig your nose, though I can't say I wasn't tempted.

Tah dah......... a platter of hairy crabs, all male, with 3 billion potential offspring on the plate to satisfy our greedy palate.
Oh, in answer to the earlier question about "Do male crabs have roe", well, [CHILDREN BELOW 18, dont read this], according to the reliable source on the table, it's kinda like Crab err...Sperm.

Look at me! I'm Hairy and proud of it!

The Glitterati throw themselves at the magnificent platter, not wanting to lose out on any action.

With the deftness of a surgeon, or a vet, the Captain deshells the crab, and reassembles it on a plate, as shown below. (corner right bottom is the Master Chef himself, whom the staff venerably refer to as Si Fu)

So, not only the Japanese can reverse engineer, so can the Chinese.

I HAVE to say, that the Male Roe was creamy and rich, and oh so good. Absolutely divine. Like eating Teuschers, Foie Gras and Truffles all at once. Shuddering in delight. Mmmmmm. Of course, that really IS the highlight, as the rest of the crab is nothing to shout about. The meat is sweet, but there's so LITTLE of it, it's like running a marathon to drink a glass of 100plus.

Dessert was Sesame Glutinous Rice Balls In Ginger Broth. As I couldn't hold my balls steady and photograph them at the same time, Nigel kindly held mine for me while I took a picture. I dunno why he only held up one ball. I reciprocated by holding up both of his, as can be seen in his post.

Not only is she the Queen, and writes like Shakespeare, and takes pictures like [who are the famous photographers in this world ah? Andy Warhol?], she can also multi task as she held up her own balls to photograph them. She the man!!! Bow bow bow, we are not worthy.

Posing for the Paparazzi.

Thanks Ciki for asking me to be your date. How else would little old me get to hob nob with who's who of the blogging world. Thank you thank you.

And special note of thanks to Mr Kong Wai Keong for having us.

The promo is on in autumn, (not our autumn la, autumn in China) when the crabs are in season. They are flown in on a weekly flight, on the promise of a vacation. At RM128++, well, it is a luxury, but hey, you have to factor in the airfare of the crabs, their rarity, and the loss of their descendants, so to savour that glorious roe, I'd say an occasional treat is in store.


thule a.k.a leo said...

your post has never failed to put a smile on my face (if not laugh).
I was talking to the wifey on the hairy crab and she seems to be interested to indulge in some of the cholesterol laden stuff...

J2Kfm said...

saw this in the paper yday (i think, kinda lost track of time!) and passing by the outlet in Pavilion.
but last yr was around RM99 right? this year RM128 !! *_*

i wonder if mr kong would be nice enough to invite poor me all the way from ipoh .... *wink*

Bangsar-bAbE said...

"The meat is sweet, but there's so LITTLE of it, it's like running a marathon to drink a glass of 100plus"

LOL...love your description! =P

thenomadGourmand said...

"noveau rich chinaman decorating his newly built mansion in Kenny Hills"
lol, I can imagine that!

KY said...

LOL wtf take turns to close eyes.

btw it's RM128 nett and not ++ tho!

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

aiyoh how to not laugh..continue the blogging la..dont always have to blog abt free food 1 mah hahaha..

CUMI & CIKI said...

Of course no one saw it fit to photograph ME wolfing down MY xiu long bao, with all the finesse of a drunken sailor on heat...! Farnee ahpa.. u giving me stitches even BEFORE gym! hahaha

CUMI & CIKI said...

i like your NEW icons.. WHO teach you?? clap clap ahpa! u rock.. hehe

babe_kl said...

LOL mow hai?? LOL :p they are known as dai jark hai

btw those metal sticks looked like those beautician used to extract black heads??

qwazymonkey said...

does one need to wank the crabs at any given time?

Lyrical Lemongrass said...

I didn't get the chinese jokes. Loved your justification for the high price tag, though, with promises of vacations and loss of descendants. Hehe. You da man, tangechi. You da man. *bowing before Her Majesty*

fatboybakes said...

thamby, what chinese jokes? i oso dont get chinese jokes one.

monkey, speeeechless! there are kids lurking around ya know.

babekl, i've never been to a beautician, but i can imagine those things would be quite useful for a number of things.

fatboybakes said...

ciki, some hawt chick tawt me...

nipples, will you read, when you have left the country???

KY, haha, oops, thanks for clarifying.

fatboybakes said...

TNG, ya, we should know right....wink wink...

bangsar babe, what to do, cant write like the flogger glitterati, nor take pics like them, so have to resort to mindless puns and analogies.

j2kfm, latch yourself to the celebrities like KY and LL and C&C and you may get lucky like me.

thule, ya, you should bring jenn to try. i think its worth the experience. glad can make you laugh or smile.

Pureglutton said...

Another good one - your post, i mean :-)) Love all your "mindless puns & analogies"... LOL! (i'm sure those took some thoughts!)

550ml jar of faith @minchow said...

A decadent feast for a dandy looking group of food peeps! Somehow the hairy crab reminds me of porn.. like good porn, y'know.. I can't help but feel uneasy when I look at it, yet can't look away.

Kong said...

Pleasure to have you at the lunch. Love your way with words!

Nic (KHKL) said...

sounds like "mow hai, hai mow?" which literally means "hairy crab, are you there?".

*trying hard to not associate it with another bushy object*

fatboybakes said...

hairy berry, hahah,chinese is so difficult hor. no wonder thamby dowan to masuk cina.

kong, pleasure meeting you too, and thanks for having me.

550ml, oooh, pray tell more, there's good and bad porn???

Allan Yap & Nigel A. Skelchy said...

Damn right there's good porn and bad porn. ;-)

Made me laugh la Ah Pa. Amazing. ;-) Love your writing. You should think of satirising so many other things. ;-)

Hugs. Fun day that.

kampungboycitygal said...

queen's the man. hold your balls and eat em' too. hehe

Ah Pa said...

kgboycitygal, indeed, she is...that's why she's thamby to me mah.

nigel dear, I MADE YOU LAUGH?? WOW!!! i am truly honored!

gfad said...

Good porn is classy. Like making love (got sexy lingerie, foreplay and no visible genitals). As opposed to having sex (bukak kaki and just cucuk wif camera focusing directly on the thrusting organ..)

So this was your one and only time eating cum..

rokh said...

just reading your post swung my mind from one side of the pendulum to the other which is from food ecstasy to you know...