Fatboybakes Virgin Baking Class

Virgin baking class, .... as in, my inaugural baking class. Not baking of virgins...we have no volcanoes to appease, and no vestal virgins to sacrifice. Neither is it a class for virgins only.

Anyway, I have always fantasized about becoming a teacher, and barking orders to terrified intimated students, and throwing chalk at them when they doze off, or sending them out the room when they make smart arsed remarks. You see, when I was a student, that's what teachers did to me. I remember clearly, in an English class, in form 4, the teacher, a buxom lady that drew whistles wherever she went, was teaching phonetics, (not fanatics), and the "a" sound. As in farm, darn, etc. The guy behind me was asked to give an example. You see, English wasn't the forte of this particular school, and most of my classmates struggled to obtain passes for SPM, so the chappie behind me was silently mumbling some prayer, so I decided to help him out, and whispered, "FART". He gave me a relieved look of eternal gratitude, and said loudly, and clearly, in intonation that would have made professor Higgins proud, "FAAAAAARTTTTTT".

Now, in those days, moral standards were a lot higher, and any expulsion of wind from any orifice WAS unspoken off, much like procreation. I dunno why, but immediately, the Puan threw ME out of class. Why me? Why did she even think it was me? Chis!

So yeah, when I was offered to teach a baking class at THE COOKING HOUSE, all my childhood memories of studenthood came flooding back, with teary nostalgia. Then it dawned on me, drats, these students are paying RM120 per head. I doubt they'd take kindly to being thrown out of class for asking "What brand are your eggs", or for eating in class. Chis. Then the next phase of realisation dawned, GASP, I've never taught baking before. Images of a rocket scientist giving his first lecture on the theories of relativity and how it affected travel at warp speed came to mind..... and my knees suddenly transformed into konyaku.

Well, not quite la. Doing a demo at the FHM two weeks earlier, with a crowd of hecklers comprising Master bakers, cordon bleu chef, Consultants from Accenture, ....kinda gave me a new found confidence. I have confidence in sunshine, I have confidence in rain, I have confidence my cake will rise again, ....

I didn't know how many to expect, and in an unusual act of desperation, actually proceeded to announce the baking class in an earlier blogpost and all over facebook, lest I be staring at at empty classroom, with only KitchenAid as my ...aid. Was therefore pleasantly surprised to see quite a number of people, including the warm familiar faces of some floggers, ie, Alilfatmonkey, and Cacoethes Scribendi, and her ever smiling boyfriend. Also, friends of friends (Bald Eagle's colleague) were there, so sweet of them.

Everything was laid out and pre measured according to the recipes I had provided, which kinda horrified me, for the class timing showed 4 hours. It doesnt take me 4 hours to make 4 cakes. Heck, I was wondering how to make the class drag. I was counting on measuring and chopping and cutting myself, or asking the students to do it.

Malaysian students are generally a shy lot. Ask for volunteers, its almost like extracting 7 trays of mosquito hearts. Shy like anything, I tell you these girls.



As the class went on, and people warmed up, then there was more interaction.


The girl at the upper right hand square is Edyth, and her sister, Mei Kei. They own the Cooking House. You can HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EDYTH TOO at the Cooking House.

On the menu for the day, were Red Velvet Cupcakes With Cream Cheese Frosting.





Due to the high amount of cocoa powder, and less artificial coloring, sadly, the cakes arent as RED as some would like them to be. But even then, I saw some people gawking at the thought of putting two teaspoons of coloring into the batter. I personally prefer the entire thing without coloring, in which case, it'll just be chocolate velvet.


The no bake chocolate mousse cake. As it takes a few hours to set, I had to bring one ready made one from home.





Flourless chocolate cakes with molten centres. Always a hit with guests at parties, and so very easy to do.


If I ever go commercial, I'll be using her as my food model. Pretty hor.



Orange Jaffa Tart. A rich chocolate tart with orange flavouring.

I had a great time actually, and I hope the students did too. I would like to thank the Cooking House and all the wonderful participants for making my first time a memorable one, and special thanks to Monkey for taking pics for me.

Will be teaching more classes hopefully in October, November and December. Check out the cooking house website for their wonderful array of different classes.